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I'm trippin over dumb drunks at a party
Girlfriend just ran off with the DJ
I give her everything, but she refused it
It doesn't matter, she don't know how to use it
My confidence is dwindling
Look at the shape I'm in
Where's my pearls, where's my swine?
I'm not thirsty, but I'm standing in line.
I'll have the usual
I'll have the usual

Fifty silhouettes bumpin' on the dance floor
Pink elephants fallin' through a trap door
Sixty cigarettes a day 'cause I'm nervous
When will that bitch serve us?
I used to be a good boy, livin' the good life
Fifty thousand kisses later she was a housewife
She was good, I was unkind
I'm not thirsty, but I'm standin' in line
I'll have the usual
I'll have the usual
(on the rocks)
(two ice cubes)
(and a little umbrella)

Big Jim says the second comin's cominI think he's just seein' double or something
Or something
You can hang around waiting for the also rans
I can't win, but I've seen enough, man
A fifth of whisky he could knock it away