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Disc scratches in]

[Jimmy Fallon:]
See thats what college is all about man you gotta love college man its the best thing in the world.
You drink you have fun you do the Walk of Shame.

[Crowd cheers]

[Jimmy Fallon:]
Yeah! You gotta do the Walk of Shame!
For those of you who dont know what the Walk of Shame is
thats when you hook up with someone the night before and you have to walk all the way across campus
all dishevelled the next morning in the same clothes.

[Crowd cheers some more]

[Jimmy Fallon: (Higher voice)]
Oh no no I was over at the libray I was over... I stayed overnight overnight studying.

[Crowd laughs]

[Jimmy Fallon:]
You go to your dorm in the morning theres like a line of kids waiting to get to the shower.
Its like bunch of zombies just walking uh-uh-uh. The guy with the flip-flops is beating everybody. [Flip-flop sounds]
Hes got his little basket of stuff with him.

[Crowd laughs]

[Jimmy Fallon:]
You have to have your little shower basket of stuff. This little baskets holds like your shampoo your soap your loofa.

[Crowd cheers]

[Jimmy Fallon:]
And girls have like this nice loofa. Its like this little mesh pink loofa.
Takes off your dead skin its really nice.
No for guys we have the option we have like this French bread lookin loofa that rips out your ass hair.
Yeah thank you very much. Ow ow! [Scratching sounds]
Ow ow! Walking back to my dorm everyones like
"Hey Jim nice tan!" Im like "Its my third layer of skin!" [Crowd laughs]
"I just over-loofad. Call the doctor. The wind hurts me whos got the window open? Shut it!"